Your mom is aging and you know that she has always been very independent and has done a good job so far taking care of herself. But you notice lately that she’s a bit slower doing things and sometimes you wonder if she is struggling with daily tasks and activities. It may be hard to know what to say, or how to ask her if she needs help.
Some warning signs that mom may need some help
- Is her home messier than usual?
- Is she wearing the same clothes a few days in a row?
- Are her personal hygiene habits falling below usual levels?
- Does she seem depressed?
- Is her overall health declining?
- Are you worried more about her than usual – for good reasons?
- Express your concerns carefully. Try not to accuse or confront.
Example: Don’t say, “I can see you can’t take proper care of yourself any more. What are we going to do about it?”
Do say, “I’ve been very concerned about you and it makes me sad. Are you getting everything you need? What can I do to help you with that? Let’s talk about some options.
- If she seems resistant, try to find out the real reasons that are producing the resistance. Maybe she is scared that she can no longer live at home. Maybe she doesn’t realize that you can hire help to come into her own home and give her the assistance she needs. Maybe she thinks she will be a burden to her family when actually, everyone would have more peace of mind knowing she is getting proper care.
- Get others to help you in your quest to talk to her. Maybe she has a friend who has used senior care services and is happy with the assistance they provide. Maybe another senior family member uses senior health care services and can tell her how great it is to have the help they need and still remain in their own home.
- Let your mom be a part of the decision-making process. Yes, you are trying to convince her she needs some home health care services, but she could still help make some of the decisions.
- Reassure her that when the senior care services come to help her, it doesn’t mean that she won’t be seeing you or her other family members any more. In fact, the extra help will free up her time to see more of her family. It’s a win-win situation. You have peace of mind, she gets the care she needs, and everyone is happy.
Home care counselors at Right at Home are available to talk with you about your in-home care needs including how to reduce caregiver stress while providing better, affordable care. We are an elder care agency providing Senior Care in Davidsonville, MD. For more information about senior care call us at (888) 281-5937.